Sunday, December 13, 2009

It's a bird. It's a plane. It's......

Prisoner turkeyImage by quinn.anya via Flickr

Making me nervous.

My goose is cooked because my turkey is not. There's an 18 lb turkey in my fridge, the centerpiece of tonight's Hanukkah meal, and I'm scared.

Millions of people have cooked millions of birds and lived to tell the tale. ('tho dead men tell no tales.) Still given my fame as a non-cook, I'm paralyzed as a non-swimmer at the edge of the diving board. How do I know if it's completely defrosted? What do you mean, I have to "tie the legs together with cooking thread"? What's cooking thread? What is the best temperature for roasting? How do I know when it is done? How do I keep it moist? How do I find room in the oven to keep latkes warm?

Oy, the latkes! They're enough of a challenge; I had to try a turkey? What was I thinking? I've already eaten the gelt. I've bitten off more than I can chew.

I'm a fry-baby.



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2 comments:

Amy Boland said...

You can do it, Susan! It will be great. Happy Hannukah!

Susan Berkson said...

The turkey has been roasting for 4 1/4 hours. The meat thermometer, borrowed from a neighbor, shows the bird's internal temp is just 160. One site says it must reach 175; another calls for 175. Guests are not here yet. Frying has not commenced.